If pictures are worth 1,000 words, then I guess I don’t even need to write anything here — the mugshot of Tiger Woods says it all: “No officer, I didn’t pay her, she just needed a ride home. And no, I didn’t know she was a man.”
According to Jupiter (Fla.) police spokeswoman Kristin Rightler, Tiger was picked up around 3am this morning on “suspicion of driving under the influence.” Well, we can stop suspecting and just call a spade a spade: my man was SAUCED.
They really should have let him keep on his iconic white Nike cap, which he was clearly wearing by the looks of his scruffled head. Seeing one of the greatest golfers of all time look like he just spent three hours trapped in an unventilated room with Willy Nelson is demoralizing.
How quickly he goes from a fist pumping, model-humping, world-dominating champ to this; an out of shape, balding, drunk driver is tragic. Hell, even the coked up Charlie Sheen looked better in his mugshot, albeit confused.
This has gotta be it for Tiger, right? I mean, do we even want to see a comeback at this point? I know I don’t. I’ve moved on to bigger, better, and younger things. (JORDAN SPIETH)