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Team Chaos Doesn’t Want An NFL Preseason, Anyway

Sep 11, 2016; Philadelphia, PA, USA; Philadelphia Eagles quarterback Carson Wentz (11) audibles at the line of scrimmage against the Cleveland Browns during the first quarter at Lincoln Financial Field. Mandatory Credit: Bill Streicher-USA TODAY Sports

There’s nothing more dull than predictability. And with all the last-second panic planning trying to adapt to the pandemic, there has been a lot of unpredictability in the sports world. Unpredictability always begets more unpredictability.

It’s blood in the water for Team Chaos. If you haven’t heard, there is officially not going to be an NFL preseason this year.

To be blunt, this doesn’t really matter to most fans. Even the most diehard fans didn’t make a point of watching their team’s preseason games. With no stakes, it’s clear the players are either just trying to stay healthy for the regular season, or they’re not so great and they’re trying to find their way onto a roster. But it’s still not the NFL football we know and love.

Owners were apparently doing everything they could to keep the preseason for monetary reasons. Which makes sense, to be fair. If all I had to do to make some money was sit in a box and watch football, I would want more games, too.

The league, AKA Roger Goodell, saves some face by limiting the amount of unnecessary contact between players. Sure, further risk of permanent brain damage that results from playing more games is one thing, but Goodell apparently draws the line at turbo-healthy athletes maybe, possibly contracting Covid. Makes sense?

Which brings us to the coaches and their staff. Every coach in the league, except for the new ones, has a pretty good idea of what their depth charts will look like when the season starts. But the fact of the matter is, there are positions of need for every team in the league.

That’s where Team Chaos comes in.

Sure, the Chiefs not getting preseason action to figure out their quarterback situation isn’t going to matter. . .but boy, do you think Matt Nagy in Chicago would like those games to figure out his QB situation? Or Zac Taylor wants all the opportunities he can get to formulate his new offensive line to protect his new franchise quarterback?

Then there’s Joe Judge, Matt Rhule, Ron Rivera, Mike McCarthy, and Kevin Stefanski. All are stepping in to new situations facing new problems. Without meaningless preseason games, they’re effectively going to have to figure out what works in games. . .in games that actually matter.

And yes, this is all dealing with NFL-level talent. It’s not like preseason games are the difference between immaculate football and the goalposts spontaneously lighting on fire or something.

BUT

It only takes one play to give us all content to laugh about for months to come. And without the preseason, we’re that much more likely to see a Colts fake punt fail. Or a botched hold on a field goal to win a game a la Tony Romo. Or, best case scenario, another Butt Fumble-type situation.

Whatever happens, Team Chaos will be there. . .watching. . .waiting.

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